Bowls Are Best

Why Plates Suck

Using a plate is the worst way to eat your food; you fill it up at the counter and on the way back to the table you have to tiptoe around everything and be super careful not to have your entire meal slide off onto the floor. And to make matters worse, you’re probably gonna make that whole dangerous journey again just to get a second serving, what with how little food a plate actually holds!

There’s got to be a better way …

Enter: the Bowl

Bowls are better than plates in every way; first off they avoid the slipping problem much better than the typical plate does. My standard for acceptable food slippage is simple. If I can’t eat my dinner while running a marathon then I’m not interested. Sorry liberals! I’m a busy person! You can’t always expect me to stay glued to my couch sipping on soylent all day.

On top of that, they can carry much more food than a plate, unless you’re using one of those sissy cereal bowls. The bowl of a man should be able to hold all the food he’s going to eat that day.

B-but, y-you can’t expect anyone to eat that much in one sitting!

I seriously hope you’re not eating more than one meal a day.

B-but w-won’t my foods be touching?

Your ancestors weep

Other Upsides

Bowls keep your silverware right where you need them: in your food. No playing around with fancy napkins or gingerly resting your silverware on the sides of your plate.

It’s also much easier to refrigerate your leftovers when your food’s already in a bowl; just wrap some aluminum foil around the edge and you’re good to go.

Finished eating and don’t want to save the scraps? Simple, just slide the food off into your trashcan. With such a narrow exit angle, there’s no way you’re going to miss the garbage. Can’t say the same for a plate!

Bowls stack better than plates, are easier to clean, are less likely to break when you drop them, and are easier to carry without sticking your fingers all in your food.

It’s no contest

Plates on suicide watch.